Portland license.

I call to get Isabel a temperament test so we can attend Sniff Cafe's (part of Sniff Dog Hotel) happy hour. She has a very good temperament so this should not be an issue. She however is not up to date on her Bordatella or Distemper shots and this is an issue.

I type my cross streets and "vet" in Google. True to her word, my mother has dropped me seemingly dead center in the Portland Universe and there's a vet two blocks away. The only appointment is in a half hour but that's not an issue. Isabel and I throw together her paperwork (the only file I've pulled from the file box and perhaps ever will), and we head to Northwest Neighborhood Vet. There's a scale in the main lobby and they ask that I weigh Isabel. I want to do her the favor of taking off her necklace, collar and harness so she'll weigh the least possible (I only weigh myself naked first thing in the morning), but they're looking at me so I put Isabel on their giant drive-up scale. She squirms on the scale so I choose the lowest flashing weight, 4.4.

Isabel is a hit at the vet's office. She pretty much creates a scene. I tell the desk attendant, "I don't quite get it. There are lots of small dogs in LA". She smirks at her co-worker and says, "I bet there are". I have just been written off as Beverly Hills or Mexican. I am not sure which.

The vet compliments me on Isabel's trim figure and recommends against falling for the super organic but super high in calories protein kibble. Then she says, did Pamela (the vet tech) tell you about fleas? No she hasn't, though she was awesome in her description of how to brush Isabel's teeth (introduce her to the process slowly by feeding her a little  toothpaste). The vet says, "We have lots of them. You need to look out for fleas in Portland". This was in none of the online or written Welcome to Portland material I've read. My mother didn't mention that Isabel would be prey in Portland. I feel misled.

I buy Isabel the cost saving three year license, wondering if this is a mistake. Should I have bought the one year license, in case Leif and I are reunited and I move back to LA? It's a $25 gamble on my marriage. I don't take it.